I'm thinking about when she eventually will breastfeed....yikes.
I have anxiety lots of it but really who doesn't? The mind goes through phases and yesterday I feel like was the beginning of what I hope is a phase.
I hope that choosing to officially settle it all down in a year or so is what I want. Meaning, have I experienced life enough? Have I had enough time to just be me and not the other half.
I was at a neighborhood function the other night and we were talking about places we would love to visit and places we have traveled to and someone brought up Australia. My elderly neighbor Claire said, "I've always wanted to go there but that's obviously not going to happen now. That is too long and far of a trip for an old lady".
It hit me. I never want to say that. I may never travel to Australia but I never want to come to the realization that it is impossible. I never want to lose my ability to dream because the reality is too thick around me.
I have somewhat felt here lately that I have allowed things in my life to get boring. That's really part of the reason I started blogging because I wanted to feel a responsibility to do fun things so I could tell you about them:)